The Best Rejection of All Time

Long story short, I had what I thought was a date with a boy on Saturday night. Only on Saturday morning, I woke up to this from said boy, sent at 1:58 a.m.:

About tomorrow evening- why don't you just come over my place and we'll get naked no strings attached? if not that's cool we can just be friends, see a movie.(sic)

Perhaps in college I could be found sans any strings. But after carefully assessing what I want out of a relationship in this current phase of my life, I think it's safe to say that if you make out with me and then say how you had a great time and want to see me again, I'm going to come with a string or two.