Tuesday, April 13, 2010

NYC Cleanse: Day 2

Went to bed last night with anxiety about the next day's juices and severe headache — I blame lack of caffeine. Wake up this morning cranky. Probably because I know I'm not getting coffee or food of any kind. I'm not hungry, I just LOVE FOOD! Cheesy pasta goodness? Get in my belly. Determined to plow through, I drink my hot lemony water and go about my business. My um, bathroom habits are fairly normal, btw. (I know you were dying to ask.) Oh! But I seemed to have lost 2 lbs. Score.

Juice 1: Green Lemon
8:30am Plug nose and go for it. Surprisingly easier than yesterday. Side note: Maybe it's mental, but I find it useful to hold my nose during Juices #1, #3, and #5, because if I can't smell it, it's not really there... right?
Juice 2: P.A.M.
10:30am Have decided that this juice is my favorite. It's refreshing and thirst-quenching... like a healthy Gatorade of sorts. I sip on this for an hour, savoring it, and trying not to think about what's to come.

Juice 3: Green Apple
1pm Halfway there! I let my boss sample the grass-in-a-bottle Green Juice, and she seems to enjoy it. Then again, she is a phenomenal cook and enjoys various types of veggies that are generally foreign to me — most of which I wouldn't touch with a 10-foot pole. Done and done. Me: 3. Green Juice: 0. But I run out of giant Starbucks straws. Must replenish stash for Juice #5. *shudders*

Juice 4: Spicy Lemonade
2:30pm No biggie. I drink this while stealing straws running errands.

Juice 5: C.A.B.
5pm Have been dreading this moment all day. Wishing I were Dwight Schrute right about now. He has a beet farm. You can't have a beet farm and not love beets. Coworker Naomi is intrigued by my plight, so I offer her a sip. (Less for me!) She mentions that it tastes like pickles. Plug nose. Dive in. And then there was one. Looking forward to tonight's "milkshake."

Juice 6: Cashew Nut Milk
8:30pm Still doesn't taste like ice cream, but I kind of like it. Kind of. Tonight I noticed that my body feels lighter, overall — likely a result of not being weighed down by cheeseburgers and donuts. This must be how vegans feel. I have no plans to convert, but I am hoping that this feeling will help me think twice about cleaning my entire plate of penne a la vodka.

Day 2: Done!


  1. I can't get the image of you drinking while holding your nose out of mind...and now I won't have to thanks to this post!

    I love this hilarious chronicle of your cleanse. Maybe you should consider doing a series like this every now and then, sort of like Emily Yoffe's Human Guinea Pig columns on Slate. :)

  2. Aw, yay, thank you!! I've never heard of Emily Yoffe, will look that up. :)


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