Only in the Northeast Corner of America...

I was dancing at Marquee, when lo and behold, Beyonce and Jay-Z were a few feet away. I think I overstepped my bounds when I tried to get a better peek at B—one of their eight bouncers pushed me back. Oops. No more getting kicked out of clubs for me.

Last night (during my determined search for hummus), I stumbled upon a drunk homeless epileptic having a fierce seizure in the middle of a sidewalk.

A bomb scare...at a New Jersey McDonald's. Cops were everywhere. Really, those unattended suitcases'll really get ya.

$12 gin and tonics, bars made of glass, models who Justin Timberlake couldn't do justice...and I lost my driver's license and my debit card. Oh well. I don't drive anyway.